Damn You, Fashion Industry!

I just returned from a short trip to the nearby town of Tourist Trap and some unsuccessful outlet shopping. I was hoping to find some clothes for spring/summer but found nothing acceptable.

I am guessing that this will be a long and demoralizing quest, as I refuse to wear clothes that are white or that are the same color as melons, citrus fruits, or Windex.* Add to that my affection for pockets....

Looks like I may have to spend spring break shackled to my sewing machine.


*Acceptable colors: black, brown, charcoal grey, purple/burgandy, navy blue, dark green, and army green.