Secret Messages

To the employee of the hair salon who couldn't hide her disdain for me as she shampooed my hair and prepped me for my haircut:

It's not that I don't tip well in general. It's just you.

To waiters (gendered assumptions edition):

Actually, I was the one who ordered the carnivore special. He ordered the tofu salad.

To the woman who runs my knitting group

I don't know how much more I can take of the small-minded bullshit you write about on your blog. I don't want to start an argument at knitting (especially since you seem unlikely to rethink your opinions).