Monday, August 08, 2011

In Which I Use the Language of Media to Describe a Social Situation

Nice guy had decided that The Little Red-Haired Girl liked him, so he set out to win her over. However, most of his encounters with women are something like, this, so he didn't just ask her out.

Instead he cooked up a plan: He invited me and some math department people to hang out at the nerd bar on Saturday night so that he could tell her that a bunch of friends were already planning on hanging out and maybe she could join us all in just hanging out. The Topologist vehemently declined, citing this as being like the set-up for a bad sit-com plot.

So Saturday I show up at the bar with one of the other people who was talked into this scheme, and the Little Red-Haired Girl isn't there. It seems that she committed some sort of perceived slight against Nice Guy on Friday*, and now she is dead to him. He explained that when he likes someone he is totally and completely devoted to them, and he would never, ever commit such a slight against someone that he is interested in. Therefore, she can not be interested in him.

Upon further discussion, it appears that Nice Guy has the following standards for women who he asks out:
  • Most be hot.
  • Must be marriage material (which he decides within five minutes of meeting someone).
  • Must be as devoted to him as he is to her.
We suggested that he might end up happier overall if he relaxed his standards a bit. Maybe go out and meet some women who don't measure up to those standards. As he has never had a girlfriend, we suggested that he might do better with a different approach.

And then yesterday he posted this to facebook:

And now, I am wondering, Rashomon-style, how the third person there interprets how the conversation went.

*She said she would stop by his office. And then she didn't.